David Brown

"The parking lot is a show! All these suburbanites with their SUVs fighting over spots that aren't big enough. Especially Friday nights."

"Sanitation Score 98.0"

"Pull forward to the last available pump. It's not rocket science."

"They have these toilet paper dispensers in the rooms that only let you get two squares at a time. Stay away from Mexican food if you're staying at this hotel."

"Sanitation score: 96.5"

"Fortunately, there's only two times that they don't have fries - lunchtime and dinnertime. The rest of your food will get cold waiting for fries."